Episcopal Church Foundation Vestry Papers - for leading congregations

There was a parish that wanted to redo their existing kitchen for the purpose of hospitality during coffee hour. Identified as a potential lead gift was a gentleman who many in that community would lovingly call a “curmudgeon.”

I`m sure your parish doesn`t have any of those.

A capital campaign team was developed to raise funds for the remodel. During the Advanced Gifts Phase (where we seek to raise about 80% of the goal from about 20% of the parish), a campaign team member was sent to this gentleman’s house to invite him to give to the campaign. The response was clear:

“Why should I give to remodel the kitchen when I have been complaining about the coffee for 5 YEARS?!”

His argument was if the parish couldn`t be trusted to buy coffee (that was better than the generic crystals), why should he entrust them with a gift? The subtext was clear: why should he give if his parish, his family of choice, wouldn`t even listen to him?

The campaign team member was distraught and asked for my help. I called the gentleman and apologized that he was asked for a gift without feeling heard for the past few years. I asked him to give me three weeks to see if a change could be brought about.

The hospitality team was charged with buying fair trade coffee and they mobilized quickly.

Three weeks later I came back to the man and asked for a second chance. He not only made the lead gift to the campaign…he set aside a planned gift to his parish. This church, thanks to his designated planned gift, will always have quality coffee.

The original text of this article has been edited to reflect ECF's current programs.