Episcopal Church Foundation Vestry Papers - for leading congregations

I’m swamped this week. At work deadlines are approaching, and the holidays are beginning. I’m sure many are experiencing something similar.

At times like this I often get caught up in trying to control and manage all the moving parts of my life. I make to-do lists, I send out emails, and create schedules. Then, I am promptly reminded that I can control very little of the world I live in. Emails and phone calls do not get returned, a project takes much longer than expected, some new task arises. Whether you believe that everything that happens is part of God’s plan, or that some of it is due to chance or human failing, we cannot deny that we are not the ultimate authority on anything.

For those of us with responsibilities (which is really all adults), it is easy to get caught up in this feeling that we should be in total control, and feel frustration when things do not go as planned.

In times like this, I find that prayer helps.

Prayer has always felt like a kind of letting go, relinquishing of control. I can’t pretend to have any theories about how prayer does or doesn’t work, but I do believe it is a recognition that I have limited control over my life, my work, over what will happen tomorrow or in the next hour.

Recognizing our need for help is not the same as abdicating responsibility. I once spoke to Bill McKibben, who is a passionate environmental activist. He often feels frustrated with the pace of change, he said, but his faith gives him hope that he can get up every morning and do the work he feels is necessary, and that maybe some higher power will meet him halfway.

This recognition of how small we are, how short our reach and how limited our vision, does not give us permission to stop trying. Rather, it gives us permission to not hold onto everything so tightly, our unfinished to-do lists and our plans.

Prayer on Sunday mornings is a good and often necessary retreat from work and the rest of the world, where we can put down our phones and step outside of our worries and ourselves and just be.