Episcopal Church Foundation Vestry Papers - for leading congregations

Sometimes you have to count to 100. Or even 1,000.

We all know the rule about emailing when we’re mad. Take a deep breath. Pound out the email with all of your frustrations. Then delete the draft, count to 10 (or 100 or more), and rewrite the message.

This is an important practice in our personal and professional lives. It’s also good advice in ministry.

Recently a local community center was vandalized. This center, funded largely by the Episcopal Church, has been committed to the neighborhood, offering meals, training, health screens, and other resources. And the vandals were both petty and cruel, spraying fire extinguisher foam throughout the commercial kitchen, destroying the food and requiring significant clean up. It was really a crappy thing for the vandals to do, and I’m certain those involved with the center were sick to their stomachs at the wanton waste. 

The problem though is that this anger came through in the center’s initial message about the vandalism. All services and programs were postponed indefinitely. The announcement felt a little punitive: Here we are, trying to help, and we get gut-punched. So we’re closing shop. Others who read the email and/or newspaper article came away with the same impression. 

Now, I know that’s not what the organizers really meant. But they let their natural human emotions dictate the initial response. They didn’t count to 100. 

The second announcement was much clearer, with an invitation for people to help, a plan for reopening, and a clear statement of commitment to the community. They took time to breath. 
Sometimes we can’t help our first response. The wounds are deep and painful, and our instinct is to lash out. But from a crisis communication standpoint, it’s vital that our response is thoughtful and Spirit-filled. It’s important to take a deep breath, to count (and pray), to even write, then delete our first response. 

They will know we are Christians by our love. Let us show that even when it’s very, very hard.