Episcopal Church Foundation Vestry Papers - for leading congregations

I wish our churches were more like my local hospital.

Over the past few weeks, I’ve been to the hospital three times for some routine appointments and tests. Each time, even before I arrived at the right department, I felt warmly welcomed. Every person greeted me in some way, with a genuine smile or a good morning.

It made me feel like they liked their work, they felt a part of something bigger than themselves. They made me feel like I mattered.

I want to bottle up their hospitality and ship it off to every congregation in the country.

On Sunday and definitely on Christmas Eve, our churches will be filled. Visitors may be sitting in your regular pew. C-and-E’s (Christmas-and-Easter attendees) will be back. And this is a wonderful opportunity to exhibit gracious and gentle hospitality. A warm smile goes a long way. A kind greeting can set folks at ease.

If you’re at a loss of what to say to visitors, consider these examples: 

“Welcome to St. Switham’s.” 
“I don’t know if we’ve met. I’m XXXX (fill in the blank!).” 
“I’m glad you’re here today.” 
“We’re having a reception after the service. I hope you’ll join us. I can walk with you to show you the way to the undercroft/fellowship hall/basement.” 

Let the conversation be natural and friendly, not awkward and smothering. I’ve been the visitor where people descended like hawks, seeing a family with two children as prime recruiting targets. That didn’t feel good; it felt desperate. 

If people don’t want to talk, that’s OK. Maybe they’re introverts. Maybe they’re praying and preparing. Maybe they don’t want any more attention drawn to them. But if conversation continues, there’s an opportunity to further engage. 

“Is this your first time here?” 
“Can I answer any questions about the service?” 
“Are you new to the area?” 

Don’t get embarrassed by the answers. Maybe the person has been attending for months, and you didn’t realize it. Just smile and apologize and perhaps follow up with, “Well, I’m glad to meet you now.” Or “Sorry, I’ve spaced out.” 

Our churches will never be like the bar at Cheers, where everybody already knows your name. But it would be nice if visitors were warmly welcomed and left feeling like at least someone cared enough to ask. 

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