Episcopal Church Foundation Vestry Papers - for leading congregations

When you have a new group, it’s important to take the time to get to know each other better, so you have the best chance of working well together. Incorporating teambuilding exercises at the beginning of your first meeting may help group members have a better understanding of each other and feel more connected to one another. 
What’s new?
First, let’s define “new team.” You may be surprised to learn what constitutes a “new” group. Of course, if you are all starting out on the same day, it’s a new group. But what if you have a vestry of seven with six members remaining and just one new person beginning? Believe it or not, you then have a whole new group.
“It’s not practical to expect the one person to play catch up with the group’s dynamics and connections,” says Bethany Frazier, a teambuilding expert at Kanuga Conference & Retreat Center. “Even if just one person is new to the group you have the makings of a new team. The dynamics change when even just one new person is introduced to the group. It’s best to take the time to do a little teambuilding work to make the most of your efforts.” 
Start at the beginning
It may be tempting to move quickly through ice breakers to get your group acquainted (or reacquainted) with each other so you can move along with the other business at hand. Don’t rush it. Sequencing team building activities is important. Begin with a very general exercise – nothing too personal. Lead an exercise or activity that does not require people to be in close contact. Keep it light. 

Continue reading...

This past Sunday was a wonderful day for The Episcopal Church. Not only was Michael Curry installed as our new Presiding Bishop, he also preached an awesome sermon in which he laid out a dynamic, exciting charge for The Episcopal Church in years ahead. 

It certainly wasn’t the first time a major church service was televised or live-streamed. However, on this occaison, as I gathered with folks in my own community along with friends from many other places at a potluck viewing party in our parish hall, really did feel like All Saints’ Day this year was a great awakening across our Church!

The message Michael Curry delivered was one we’ve long needed to hear, and it has been high time for us to get on and get going as living members of the “Jesus movement." Combining a wonderfully straightforward, even traditional Christology, and a call to renew the common good, he offered a vision as well as a theology that will motivate many Episcopalians to participate and celebrate.

As I sat and watched the celebration, feeling myself moved to joy at times and tears and laughter at other points, I was also aware that I had one foot in two worlds. Earlier that morning, you see, St. George’s, Valley Lee – the congregation I have the pleasure of serving – just wrapped up a three-part series in which we talked about and discerned togheter the future of our congregation. We’ve been talking about collaboration and shared ministry and, perhaps, even striking out to find an entirely new model, a new way to ‘be church’ in our community for a long while now. Meanwhile, we’ve also been participating in and leading these conversations in our region of our diocese. Our neighbor congregation, Church of the Ascension in Lexington Park, Maryland, also had these same conversations on these same past Sundays, and we plotted the same talking points at the same places on the same three Sundays, culminating on All Saints’ Day. At St. George’s, we talked about by-laws and canons and who has the right to change the shape of the parish. We talked about money and committees and pro’s and con’s of different models of being church – from Do Nothingon one end of the spectrum, to Merge Everything (and Sell Real Estate) on the other. It wasn’t necessarily the most prayer-filled series of gatherings, and we weren’t always focusing on Jesus and the mission of the church, but you have to let people find their voice, I say, no matter where that initial voice comes from.

Continue reading...

Happy Birthday ECF Vital Practices! We’re celebrating five years of ECF Vital Practices. To date, we’ve published 60 Vestry Papers issues online (that’s 240 articles), plus thousands of Vital Posts blogs. 

The best part? We couldn’t do this without you – our contributors who share their stories, all of our readers and subscribers, and all of you who share each issue with others. Together, we’ve reached 391,531 unique visitors (and close to 2 million page views) since the site went live in late October 2010. Thank you.

At ECFVP we recognize how much attention to detail goes into any organization or effort. In this issue of Vestry Papers, we share articles and stories covering some of the practical aspects of managing a congregation. Our articles include:

Continue reading...

We failed. Not a big, catastrophic failure. Nothing that will change the future of humankind, the nature of the neighborhood, or the flavor of the church.

But a fundraiser idea that I pitched and planned two years ago has died. Essentially, I thought it would be easy to add a Christmas boutique to an already existing fundraiser (a spaghetti dinner). The idea was that vendors could reserve a table at no cost and give a tithe – 10 percent – to the church of their sales. If they made out like bandits, awesome. It’s a win-win. If these small, mostly self-employed folks didn’t sell anything, they lost a couple of hours but no money. (You can read about it in more detail).

It seemed easy all around. The work required a bit of coordination with vendors and easy set up around the fellowship hall. But it caused consternation. Our fellowship hall is small and the vendor tables meant fewer places to eat for the spaghetti dinner, which was raising money for an in-house ministry. I think perhaps some of the folks coordinating the dinner felt like the boutique took away from the focus of the dinner. Some of the vendors sold quite a bit (especially the booth featuring delicious peanut brittle); others were disappointed.

At the end of the day, we decided to pull the plug—at least on this iteration of a combined boutique/fundraiser. There’s some energy to host a boutique at another time, perhaps after worship on a Sunday. We’ll see. I think the important thing though is the acknowledgement and acceptance that we tried something, it didn’t work, and that’s OK.

Continue reading..

About a week ago I went to a reading at my friend's house. This happens every month or two. We gather in his living room and read things we’ve written or read that we’d like to share. Sometimes people read a funny piece of spam they’ve encountered, an essay they are working on, or a passage from a short story they love. 
This particular evening one person read some lovely and heartfelt poetry that had never been read by another human being. Someone else read some of her touching and funny thoughts about death, including the death of her mother. One friend composed a letter to her recently deceased friend right in front of us, which was both raw and moving.
Most of these people are not religious. They don't go to church and or necessarily believe in God. Nonetheless there was something holy about how honest and vulnerable we all were there in my friend's house. 
In church sometimes we are too concerned expressing and creating polished, joyful moments, rather than the harder truths about our doubt and fear. Yet, as the Commemoration of All Souls Day and all the celebrations around it remind us, we also need those difficult and honest commemorations of death and pain we’ve all experienced. 

Continue reading...

It’s harvest season here in the Pacific Northwest, a season to celebrate the abundance and generosity of God. The abundance from garden is always a little overwhelming at this season, inspiring creativity and generosity in order to cope. I love experimenting with new recipes and writing prayers and liturgies that express my gratitude. I love inviting friends and neighbors to share God’s generosity, and I love to take time to look back over the year and remind myself of the new things God has grown in my life that are part of this abundant harvest.

This is a great time of year to inspire our congregations with gratitude and generosity. Helping those we shepherd see the world from a perspective of God’s abundance, rather than the economy of scarcity our culture constantly bombards us with, is very important. Harvest festivals can be combined with services of thanksgiving or opportunities to share from our own abundance with those in need around us.

The following prayer is one I wrote several years ago that has been extensively used by congregations for celebrations at this season. 

Continue reading...

The Episcopal Church just celebrated “Social Media Sunday” -- a time to post and tweet images and messages about church across various social media platforms. As it turned out, our congregation (along with the sister congregation that worships with us once a month) was celebrating Halloween. This generated some fun image opportunities, as well as a notable contrast between my staid Gen X costume (alb and stole) and my Millennial priest colleague who dressed as the chaplain at Monster University.

I’m really not a fuddy duddy when it comes to social media. I help keep our parish Facebook page current, and I love taking pictures of church in action. I don’t tweet, but only because I’m not sure the format fits my life and my personality.

I suspect the church is called to “both/and” when it comes to our approach to social media.

We need to respect and engage with the media of our age, because we are not a church that spurns the world and its ways.

And, we need to provide a respite from the pressures and social illness of our age, which include overuse of social media and the pressure to “measure up” to the lives others portray through curated images.

We need to get the gospel out there.

Continue reading...

Why celebrate the major holy days of the church?

The Feast of All Saints is coming up on Sunday, Nov. 1, and many of us will mark the day with special prayers during worship. And of course, we’re in church for the Nativity of Our Lord on Christmas Day and the Resurrection on Easter. But what about the other major holy days? Did you set aside time for Saint James, the brother of Jesus, last Friday, Oct. 23? And earlier in the month, did you observe the holy day for Saint Luke the evangelist?

Yeah, me either. I grew up in another tradition and am still learning and absorbing the role of the saints in the life of The Episcopal Church. But that’s really just an excuse. Frankly I don’t make the time, and I haven’t made it a priority. I’m not alone. Most parishioners and many priests don’t celebrate the major feasts. I have heard a few priests say that they would – but it’s not in the piety of their parishioners, so they don’t want to spend their time in that way. (What about leading by example? Ah, a blog for another day). 

Perhaps because so many of us don’t honor the major holy days (just the major, major ones!), we ask our priests why they bother. Why hold a service for just a few people? Isn’t that a waste of time? 

Continue reading...

It’s that time of year when many phone calls or coffee hour chats will include the fateful question, “Would you please consider running for vestry?”

Traditionally, many people view vestry membership as similar to serving on the board of directors of a not-for-profit agency. And truly, there are many similarities. As our new Vestry Resource Guide explains, “Vestry members are legal representatives and agents of a parish, charged with specific responsibilities by the canons of The Episcopal Church. They share leadership responsibilities with the rector.”

If this is the main dimension of your church vestry, perhaps the vestry could benefit from some prayerful discernment about how it provides leadership and direction that supports vibrant ministry and growth. Here are some questions to get that conversation started:

Continue reading...

Even the most well-intentioned person can grow weary during a meeting. We’ve all experienced it. Your attention gets distracted, you start thinking of other things that need to be done and then WHAM you’re called on in the meeting, and you don’t know the topic. For some, this is just a bad dream from which to awake. For others, it could be an embarrassingly real situation, but one that might be avoidable.

As the leader, you want everyone to pay attention and contribute to the meeting. But, the reality is that people’s energy levels—and attention spans—waver during a meeting, especially a long one. What can you do as the leader to keep your team’s energy levels up? What steps can you take to manage your team’s needs so they can be at their best?

“You can take action before you meet to help your team’s energy remain high during your meeting,” explained Bethany Frazier, one of Kanuga Conference & Retreat Center’s teambuilding experts. “It all begins with the agenda.”

Is this necessary?

Continue reading...

I used to skip over pictures like this too. And click past the blogs that touted the merits of Sabbath time. After all, who has time for that?

I’m learning though that I don’t have the time to not have Sabbath. I have spent far too many days and weeks with no opportunity to recharge and refresh. And I’m not as good at my work or in my personal life when I’m stretched and exhausted. None of us are. Heck, even our iPhones, a symbol of industriousness and connection, need to be recharged.

I’m learning the importance of Sabbath time each week. (Maybe I’ll eventually get to setting aside time each day. But it’s a process. And I’m some times a slow learner). I’ve always taken vacation time each year. I love to travel, and I think that extended time away from our routines is vital. But I haven’t been very good at finding time each week for rest and reflection. I’m a workaholic with a guilty conscience. That’s probably a pretty good combination for my employer but not so great for my soul. I work really hard, and if I’m not working, I normally feel guilty about it. That is, I did until this summer.

Our staff receives every other Friday off. I’m not sure when the practice began but I think it had to do with some lean years and a way to compensate the staff without busting the budget. For my first couple of years here, I rarely took the Fridays. There was too much to do (I convinced myself).

This summer, I was facing an abundance of unused vacation days so I decided to spread them out, taking the alternate Fridays off. For two months, I worked four-day weeks. My husband was convinced that I wouldn’t follow through (he knows me well). But I did. And I loved it.

Continue reading...

Holy and Effective Retreats

In the October Vital Practices Digest, we’re sharing five resources to help you plan a holy and effective retreat for your vestry or other leadership team. Our fifth resource is to help congregations strengthen their practice of year-round stewardship.

Please share this digest with other leaders in your congregation and extend an invitation to subscribe to ECF Vital Practices to receive Vestry Papers and the Vital Practices Digest.

Continue reading...

A friend recently told me about a congregation in St. Mary’s County, Maryland – the community I also serve – whose Sunday morning collection is incredibly large, incredible, she reported, given the size and location and make-up of the congregation. It’s not an Episcopal congregation, and I know only a little bit about that particular church, but I do know they are situated and serving one of the poorest communities in our county. But, apparently, what their members give of their treasure, not to mention their time and talent, is huge.

“What do you think about this?” she asked me, aware that we, too, were starting our annual fundraising campaign. “Do you think that they’re doing something we’re not?” There were probably many answers to those questions, some “yes,” some “no.” Frankly, I often have these same questions. What is keeping us back, I wonder? What’s holding back The Episcopal Church? Honestly, we’re not very good at talking about money, let alone biblical standards such as giving 10% of one’s income (which, by the way, is also our own church’s standard). But is it all just about money? Maybe those other congregations are doing more for their people? Maybe they’re providing job connections or more meaningful work or more frequent bible studies and prayer groups? We’re also not especially great at talking about discipleship, to be honest.

I really don’t think that people in this particular congregation are paying more because they’re getting – pardon the pun – better services. In fact, I think that that kind of thinking is a fundamental part of the problem. I don’t think the leadership of this congregation spends a lot of time quantifying precisely what they do for people so that people, in turn, will commit greater amounts of money to their offering plates on Sundays. I think that that kind of economic thinking is what’s getting in the way, plain and simple. But countless dioceses and congregations in our Episcopal Church go about this thinking, year in and year out. Consider, if you will, the often-praised narrative budget strategy as Exhibit A.

Continue reading...

About the only time I listen to the radio is in the car. And, since I work from home and often walk when running errands, I'm not in the car very often. Which makes me categorize my choice to drive recently as a “God moment.”

On the air was an interview with Andrea Campbell, attorney and first time candidate, challenging a long time incumbent to represent District 4 on the Boston City Council. What caught my attention – and stuck with me – was her answer to this question, “Why should the voters in District 4 choose you, new to the process, versus someone with a proven record? Here’s her response:

“When I set out to run, I didn’t wake up one day and say ‘I’m going to run for Boston City Council.’ I prayed a lot about my God given purpose.” After talking a bit about her work with Governor Patrick’s administration and other related experience, Andrea continued, “For months I said, ‘What is my God given purpose, what is my assignment?’ This run for city council is my response. I never made it about Councilor Yancy… It’s truly a calling in my heart and for me, from the beginning, it’s about how you bring a different perspective on the issues affecting the community"

Continue reading...

It’s fall and everyone’s busy. Programs have started up again, kids are back in school, and days feel shorter. During these times, when deadlines are approaching and I feel short on time, I find I have the most trouble being generous. Not generous with my money so much as generous in my attitudes toward my coworkers or fellow community members.

When I’m waiting on a coworker or fellow volunteer to send along some information so I can finish a project, it can be hard to remember that they probably have many tasks on their to-do lists and many other things demanding their time. When I’m stressed, I’m a little less likely to give other people the benefit of the doubt.

Being generous with others, being stewards of our good will and the time we take to understand each other, is part of loving our neighbors as ourselves. I’d like others to give me the benefit of the doubt. Sometimes I have to put volunteer activities aside so I can focus on a project at work for a week or two, and sometimes a high priority request at work means other tasks have to wait. This happens to everyone.

Imagine yourself on your worst day. Imagine the dumb thing you said or the deadline you missed because you were overworked or the blog you wrote too hastily. Remember how much it means to hear others say out loud that they like your work or express sympathy when you were ill. And remember that everyone else feels basically the same.

Continue reading...

When I was a kid my parents often dragged me and my brother to museums. It wasn’t just that they were trying to ram some culture down our throats; they were genuinely inspired by art and wanted to share that passion with their children. Much of which was lost on the two of us who whined and complained our way through centuries of magnificent works of art until we reached the great pinnacle of the museum experience: the gift shop.

But I remember being fascinated with one particular style of painting known as pointillism. That’s the medium in which small distinct dots are placed in patterns that make up images. When you stand up close all you see is a bunch of dots. But as you back up, the figures and background begin to emerge. At a certain distance you can no longer even tell that there are any dots at all. They blend together to form what looks like a typical painting.

Perhaps the most famous example of pointillism is the late-19th century Georges Seurat painting titled “A Sunday Afternoon on the Island of La Grande Jatte.” It hangs in the Art Institute of Chicago, a place I went to (of my own accord!) a few times when I was attending seminary in Chicago. They have a great gift shop, by the way.

I was thinking about this recently as it relates to our lives. So often we focus on the dots while missing the big picture. We get annoyed with our children for spending too much time on the Xbox rather than giving thanks for the gift of their very existence. We get frustrated with the time it takes to attend to the needs of aging parents rather than being grateful for their continued presence in our lives. We focus on doing the dishes rather than enjoying the company of our guests.

Continue reading...

On Sunday, we had a new priest. For the day. And our priest made his way to her congregation.

Pulpit exchanges aren’t a new concept, but I’d like to promote a resurgence. Having clergy swap for a day can be an important exercise in understanding a theology of connectedness that is at the heart of the Anglican Communion. There are other benefits too: it can be a refreshing change for the congregation. And for the clergy. It’s also a good opportunity for the leadership of the laity to shine, as they lead and support the visiting priest through the local rhythms of worship.

All too often we get caught up in the life and cycle of our own congregation, forgetting that we are bound by tradition and history to 70 million Anglicans around the world. If these connections seem too big to comprehend, consider how we also lose sight of our connection to the wider Episcopal Church, to our diocese, and even to our deaneries—the congregations nearest in geography. This is a human condition. It happens in all parts of our lives. Our homes are places of refuge that we don’t often leave to meet our neighbors and connect with those around us. In our work, we forget the needs of other departments. It’s a natural tendency to focus on our own needs, our own circles of family and friends. 

Continue reading...

When the timpani rumbled with the first chords of the opening hymn, it was obvious this would be an extraordinary worship experience. The sweeping harp, the proclaiming brass, the richness of the strings, caught up the congregation in the powerful words of Hymn 518: “Christ is made the sure foundation, Christ the head and cornerstone…”
The celebration of the Eucharist in this mass at Trinity Episcopal Church in Fort Wayne, Indiana, was dedicated in honor of the 150th anniversary of the laying of the church’s cornerstone in 1865. Trinity doesn’t always have an orchestra and extra voices in the choir, but on this day, all the stops – including the ones on a new organ – were pulled out.
Music was skillfully composed for the milestone event by Trinity’s gifted Precentor, Wayne H. Peterson. Meditations, for choir, soloists, orchestra, and organ, drew “its (sic) inspiration from those who lavishly communicated the Gospel of Christ through architecture, art, and music,” says Peterson. Parishioner Larry Griffin authored the lyrics for four of the seven “meditations” within the score, saying the words were inspired by others including Mother Teresa, Helen Keller, and the Prayer of St. Chrysostom. Here are the soulful words of Meditation No. 3: The Inner Voice:

Continue reading...

Walking into your first meeting as a new leader of a group can be unnerving. You may have known the members for years as part of your church community, but this new situation may feel like you are entering a room full of strangers. According to Kanuga Conference & Retreat Center’s teambuilding expert Christine Murawski, there are five principles to consider to help your first meeting go smoothly.
Be Authentic
You have been called to serve in this leadership role, and your true self is what is needed. Behave otherwise and people will notice. 
“There are times when a new leader knows the previous leader and his or her personality style. It’s tempting to try to match their approach,” said Murawski. “However, the key to your success is to relax and be your authentic self. Your team will acknowledge your leadership differences, pick up on your confidence and will want to follow.”
Prepare
Get ready for your meeting well in advance by creating an agenda. This exercise helps you set clear goals and envision how the meeting will go. Plus, having an agenda allows you to be organized and confident during your meeting. Allow extra time in your agenda for participants’ thoughts or extra topics your team may believe are important to bring up. Share your agenda with the group at the beginning of the session. Doing so sends the message that you respect their time and desire their input. 
Be Flexible

Continue reading...

Peanut butter and jelly. Peter and Paul. Kardashians and reality TV. Some things just go together.

And so it is for fellowship and food. For many churches (and frankly, most social gatherings), food and fellowship are natural companions. And even as someone who has struggled with weight, I think this is (mostly) fine. Food is a lubricant of sorts, giving people something to do, something to talk about as a way to start building relationships. Instead of weather talk, the conversation might turn to the BBQ. This BBQ is amazing. Oh, you like BBQ? You should try Eli’s. And the conversation is off and running.   

This isn’t shallow. It’s a start. Sure, we can tsk, tsk, and ask why people aren’t using their fellowship time to talk about the joy of the resurrection or take an exegetical moment with transfiguration. But most relationships don’t start that way. They start casually, with people sorting and finding common ground. Then they can move into deep and abiding conversations, exploring God’s Word together.   

Continue reading...